What is Good Girl Syndrome?
In today's modern society, women continue to grapple with the expectations thrust upon them by a phenomenon commonly known as the Good Girl Syndrome. This term refers to the set of societal norms and expectations that women are raised to follow from a young age, perpetuating the belief that being "good" means being submissive, agreeable, and self-sacrificing. From a young age, girls are often taught to prioritize the needs of others over their own, to be polite and accommodating, and to avoid assertiveness for fear of being seen as "difficult" or "bossy." They are expected to embody the traditional values of femininity, projecting kindness, nurturing, and selflessness in their interactions. While these qualities are not inherently negative, Good Girl Syndrome becomes problematic when they restrict a woman's autonomy, voice, and the ability to establish healthy boundaries. The consequences can be detrimental to a woman's self-worth, fulfillment, and overall well-being.
One of the key impacts of the Good Girl Syndrome is the suppression of a woman's true desires, dreams, and ambitions. These societal expectations pigeonhole women into certain roles and professions, discouraging them from pursuing their passions or stepping outside the predefined path. Society often rewards women who conform to these expectations with approval and affirmation, further reinforcing the cycle of acceptance. However, this can leave women feeling trapped and stuck, leaving many feeling unfulfilled and yearning for self-expression.
Women often find themselves prioritizing others' needs at the expense of their own happiness. They may struggle to voice their opinions or set boundaries, fearing judgment, rejection, or rocking the boat. These patterns foster an environment where women become people-pleasers, often neglecting their own self-care and emotional wellbeing in the process. Within the workplace it can also slow down career growth and accept behaviors and treatment that are unprofessional, unfair or unsafe.
Is this starting to sound familiar to you? If so, here are some places to start. When you start to wake up to your Good Girl Syndrome, know that the process of leaving it behind will require inner reflection, self-awareness, and a willingness to challenge societal norms. Recognizing that being "good" does not equate to your own desires is a crucial first step. You must embrace their authenticity, understanding that your worth is not tied to conforming to others' expectations. It involves letting go of the fear of being confrontational or losing people/society’s disapproval. The process may feel uncomfortable at times, but you and your happiness are worth it.
“We can choose courage or we can choose comfort, but we can't have both. Not at the same time.' ~ Brene Brown
